We Love Hanan

In Tribute, In Honour…

Kids loved her because of her purity. One of her favorite songs is You Are Amazing. She was an athlete in life and in heart. Her smile is a smile of peace. Her beauty is a beauty of class. She taught her cousins to be responsible by involving them to assist other people at the camp site when she was at Dixie Bloor.

She fights for everybody’s right and always shows the two sides to every fact. She was the God Mother of her cousins. She was the first grand child that Jodi Kamel got to know that Majeda was pregnant. She gave her grand parents from both sides the joy. Her angelic beliefs combined with wisdom is out of this world. She respects the older and is kind to the younger.

-Your Khalto Amal

Kids loved her because of her purity. One of her favorite songs is You Are Amazing. She was an athlete in life and in heart. Her smile is a smile of peace. Her beauty is a beauty of class. She taught her cousins to be responsible by involving them to assist other people at the camp site when she was at Dixie Bloor.

She fights for everybody’s right and always shows the two sides to every fact. She was the God Mother of her cousins. She was the first grand child that Jodi Kamel got to know that Majeda was pregnant. She gave her grand parents from both sides the joy. Her angelic beliefs combined with wisdom is out of this world. She respects the older and is kind to the younger.

– Your Khalto Amal

Dearest Hanan,

I know that it’s too late for words, but I still hope that these words reach you somehow…I don’t want them to hurt, I want them to heal…but your passing has left us with a very deep cut…Salma, David and I prepared a few words (attached) that we hope can bring some comfort to Khaltou Majeda, Ammou Wajdi, Suzy, Nidal, Steve, Nathalie, Rima, Joujou and Basim…It’s sad that it takes loosing someone special like you to bring us all closer together, but it’s a sacrifice we are sure that you were most welcome to accept, because you’ve lived selflessly and you’ve always given without asking for anything in return…

We are hopeful that when next we meet, we will have at least lead the lives that you wanted for us to lead…We are sorry that the struggle got tough and we wish we could have seen you one more time (actually, since we’re wishing, we would wish that you never got sick and that you never left and that we were all happy and together drinking matte)…But we will remember you in every cup of coffee, in every sip of matte, in every one of Aunt Majeda’s smiles, in every glimmer of hope and love in Nathalie’s eyes, in every good joke Basim will make; we will see you in everything around us…

Guide us our sweet sweet angel, so that one day we might meet again and laugh about all that was, all that is and all that will be….
Love you our dearest,
Salma, Walid & David

P.S. We’ve been looking for photos of us with you, and they are very hard to find, I’m sorry to say…But we don’t need photos to remember the moments we shared…they are forever engraved in our hearts

One of the things the aunts use to do when Hanan was born, was to put her in the middle of the bed and circle around her singing, tickling and teaching her all her aunts names. Each one of us would race to see if she pronounces our name first. Teta Najia ten takes her away from us and tell us, you are too many aunts and you are driving her crazy. She would smile when teta Najia carried her, in her arms she slept so peacefully.

You Khalto Amal

There is one picture in this bunch that truly hits close to heart for me. It is the one of Hanan playing with the kids. Like she always loved to.

Alla Yor7ama. We will never be able to find anyone like her.

This is a story that truly reminds me of Hanan.

When Hanan last visited Lebanon, we all went up to the Nabi Ayyoub to visit. At the end of our visit Hanan, Khalto Majida and I went to the Shaykh there and asked for some ‘holy oil’. The Shaykh agreed to give us some oil; however he didn’t have a container to put it in.
Khalto Majida thought for a while, and then she proceeded to take her medicine container, empty her pills into a tissue and give the container to Hanan. During that time another lady had come and asked the Shaykh for oil as well, only to have the same dilemma of no container. She spotted the container in Hanan’s hands and asked her whether she had another one so that she could take some oil for her own daughter.
Hanan looked over to Khalto Majida and replied with a smile on her face : “Eh! Akeed! Tfaddale” and gave the lady the only container she had.
The lady went back to the shaykh and filled the container with oil, thanked Hanan, and left.
I was shocked.
I said “Ya Hanan, I’m sure she wouldn’t have minded if you said this was your only one.”
Khalto Majida then replied “Ma this is Hanan, ya David”
Hanan then smiled and told me “Even if I had taken that oil, knowing that I didn’t give it to the lady, it would not have done any good for me”.

It took me a while to fully digest this incident. I was standing still… thinking. “Why?! ….Why would someone do such a thing. No matter what the oil is holy and it could do some good for her.”

Then it dawned on me: Khalto had it all figured out …“This is Hanan”.

Hanan is the good deed we do every day. Hanan is the smile we bear. Hanan is doing what is good despite what all our selfish desires want.
What Hanan gave the lady that sunny day a few years ago was not only an empty container to be filled with ‘holy oil’. She gave me a lesson on how to be loving, warm-hearted, kind, caring and tender. She gave me a lesson on how to be Hanan!

I know she is smiling down on us today.

Her memory will live on in our hearts and minds forever.

Your Cousin David

I read in one of the messages that

Hanan likes Abdul Halim Hafez

…and the memory came flooding back to me!
I remember that in the house in Ammatour, she used to have all Abdul Halim’s cassettes or posters, I cannot remember coz it’s been a while, on the headboard of her bed…Her bed was by the balcony door, Suzy’s in the middle and Rima’s on the wall with the door…We loved that bedroom…Joujou and Basim’s room was cool too, but for some reason we would hang out in that bedroom, we’d put the mattresses up and make them slides and slide over them, we’d hide in the closet during hide and seek, so much so that we broke that closet’s door…and then there were the water fights, balloon water fights, ghost stories, etc.
Allah yerhamik ya hayatna.

Your cousin Walid

Hanan ya 7anan, mitil el 7ob bil wardi mawjoodi bi kil makan. Wardi ma bitzool, bitdal bi ‘loobna biki zaman

Your cousin Feras

Our Hanan has lived her whole short life by one rule: positivity makes all obstacles easy to conquer. She would never give in to cancer; it almost seems like it wasn’t even the disease she had to live with.

It is true that cancer is what terminated her life, but it had never won the war with Hanan. For Hanan only left when she decided that it was time she cast out her frail body and free her pure spirit to allow her soul to take its place in heaven, where it truly belongs.
Our Hanan was young, yet the life lessons she passed to all who knew her prove that she had matured with her ordeal. She opened our eyes and made us believe that if we were positive, we could overcome anything. She taught us about acceptance with whatever God has destined for us. She showed us what it would be like to have an angel from heaven living amongst us and touching each one of us with her lovely high spirits and serenity. She was the role model that all would follow and look up to. She was and will remain our HERO, and nothing will ever change the fact that OUR HANAN WILL CONTINUE TO LIVE IN US BECAUSE WE HAVE LEARNED FROM HER THAT POSITIVITY DOES MAKE MIRACLES COME TRUE.

Your Khalto Sindy, who wishes she was here

She was always ready to listen to her aunts because she felt their love towards her and made them feel happy that she is good even is she was in pan, she made it easy for us, by reassuring us and having us believe she is fine while she was suffering. We love you Hanan.

Your Khalto Linda

During the war, uncle Saed and Khalto Majeda were all with us in Ain Al Remaneh. There were so scared for Jimmy and Hanan at the time as they were babies and gun shots were spreading everywhere. I remember I got a scarf from mom’s closet and put it on her head not to hear the noise and started doing actions so Hanan and Jimmy would laugh instead of cry. They laughed and thought the noise was music.

Your Khalto Amal

When Hanan and Suzy were babies, Renda was Majeda’s right hand. She even got Basma and Rajaa involved. She brought them up making sure that Majeda would never get tense having to deal with two babies. Renda comes home tired, wakes up the second day, we ask “where are you going Renda?” she replies “I am going to Hanan and Suzy” she never replied I’m going to Majeda’s.

Your Khalto Amal

I used to tel Uncle Najib, Hanan is HACKIM and she looks like us. He aws never offended and used to tell me whatever you say. That is the reason I want the HACKIM in my home.

Your Khalto Amal

Hanan would be so very proud of the way that everyone has been there for each other and pulled together, united in their support. It just goes to show that we all carry a little bit of Hanan inside ourselves; So, if we are looking for positives to come out of something this painful, it is that new friendships will be formed and cemented for life…and Hanan would just love that.Nothing was more important to Hanan than those close to her, so let’s keep close to each other and do what she would want. Hanan is so alive in every single one of us and between us we have so many amazing memories to share, so let’s just keep sharing them and enjoying them. She would want us to be happy. Laughter always got her through all her hard times and laughter will get us through ours. So I guess what I’m trying to say here is…and these are Hanan ‘s words, not mine, “Don’t forget to laugh and when you do laugh, don’t feel guilty because you are supposed to be mourning for me, laugh because I am still here with you all, laugh because I can hear you.”
So carry on as Hanan would want you to, be strong, dedicate things to her, continue to make her proud…speak to her, speak about her, keep her close and in your heart.
Let the memories of Hanan And let the warmth of her eyes and smile dry our tears, Hanan im so lucky to have had you as a Best friend……
I feel so strange; there are times when I still feel this is all a nightmare.
But when I understand this is real, my only comfort is in knowing she is in a better place; up there she will be with me wherever I go, until we meet and laugh again like we used to.
Love you lots my beautiful Hanan .. (muchessssss to you ya albi)

Your Friend Zeina Rizkallah

كل يوم بفيق الساعة 6:00 بحضر ولادي للمدرسة بنزلن عالباص وبطلع عالبيت بتطلع من الشباك وبقول بونجور حنان وبقلها شو اشتقتلها وبترد عليي بنسمة هواء،، بحكي معها وبقلها بتمنى ما كون زعلتها مني وتسامحني لاني ما كنت على اتصال فيها لاتطمن عليها مع العلم كنت عارفة ايامها معدودة، بس انا اكيدة من علاكي رح تسامحيني وتذكرينا بصلاتك،، انا اكيدة انك نايمة بحضن العذرا ويسوع، صليلنا حنان لنتقبل كل ظروفنا ببسمة بتشبه بسمتك، انا بحبك كثير ورح اشتقتلك كثير وكل يوم رح اتطلع بالسماء وصبحك، الى اللقاء حبيبتي حنان لن انسى بسمتك

Your Friend Aida Yazbeck

I was having a very rough day today…But then a white pigeon came and perched on my bedroom’s window sill…At first, I didn’t think much of it, because I was in a negative space…I thought: “It’s 43 degrees outside, the sun is very bright, the pigeon probably wants to just land for a bit and relax”…But then I saw how that pigeon was just so calm…I’ve never seen a pigeon that way…It was not fidgeting or walking around bobbing its head and cooing like they usually do…It just perched there and sat there waiting…I walked closer to the window and it started to look at me…Still it did not make any move except for tilting its head…we spent a good minute just staring back and forth at each other…it’d turn its head left and then right and then left again to make sure I was still there and I would not remove my sight from it…so I stood there, waiting for it to fly away, to leave behind some sort of message, some sort of life lesson…then for a split second, I thought, what if this was Hanan’s messenger…here to check up on me and see how I was doing? And when that thought dawned on me, I pretended to be holding it together, to shake off the feelings that I have been having and to be strong…but I wasn’t…And if missing you makes me weak, then I am…I am weak…but I am also thankful…thankful that you have given me a reason to love someone as much as I love you…thankful to see that this love never goes away and that it only gets stronger…I love you…I love you…I love you…I am praying for all of us to get strong and for your love to heal us…I am praying that we honor you in everything we do (big or small)…I am praying that I see this pigeon again tomorrow, the day after tomorrow and every day after that…Maybe it’s just a pigeon…But I really need it to be a message from you, because your messages always used to give me the strength I need to conquer any bad day…I love you…I love you…I love you

Your Cousin Walid

Poems for Hanan

…and then came the time when our blessed Hanan realized the only way she could bring calm to every persons heart is to leave the body that caged her and float in each and every heart as a spirit. Her love is so strong, that her human life did not allow her to share it as she please.

We are caged by our bodies, and we only become free when this cage breaks and lets our spirit free. For when we are in our bodies we can only dance on the ground and when our spirit leaves it can dance where it please, on earth’s soil, in the air and in people’s hearts.

​Your cousin Dareen

Our hearts are heavy and the wound is deep

Knowing our beloved rests in eternal sleep

Moments we cherish, memories we keep

Can never hold back the tears we weep

For with an angel’s smile, each morning you greeted

Even when all your strength was just about depleted

In the face of Cancer, you never retreated

Oh how we prayed for a cure to beat it

We will treasure your memory and celebrate your life

Even when it hurts most, we’ll push against the knife

We will keep fighting and won’t give up the strife

For you Hanan, our mother, our daughter, our wife

You taught us to listen, to be patient and strong

Whatever life throws our way, you taught us to play along

Your sympathy, your compassion and your love live on

People near and far are singing your song

Like a shooting star racing across the sky

Your love shines bright, even from up high

And though it will be hard to say goodbye,

We know that someday all angels must fly

May your soul find relief and peace in the arms of God and the angels, and while your beauty and

strength may have left our side, we pray that they are welcomed just as lovingly on the other shore.

Always and Forever,

Your cousins Salma, Walid and David

… so I light this candle for you, an everlasting flame like the energy you contain. Your optimism is my inspiration and my life will go on with an honoured dedication.

Thank you Hanan. Your beauty, strength and optimism inspires me.

Your cousin Dana

.انا لله وانا اليه راجعون
الموت حق ، والموت قرين الحياة فلا حياة بلا موت ولا موت بلا حياة. وهذه الحقيقة وجب علينا ادراكها ايمانا منا بمشيئة الله . ففاجعة الموت تحل, فتخطف الاحبة وتخطف معهم القلوب المتعلقه بهم. وفقد الاحبه بالموت تجربة لها وقع في القلب كلسع الجمر، تورث حسرة وقهرا وانكسارا في الروح خاصة حين يكون الاحبة فلذات الكبد ، فليس هناك حب كحب الولد، لذا فقد الاولاد بالموت لا يضاهيه شئ، ومهم…ا قيل عن حرقة الم فقدهم لا يمكن ان يبلغ في الصدق درجة احساس من جرّبه واكتوي بجمره.
فاليوم فأن الموت سيخفي جسدك يا حنان الي مثواه الاخير لتكوني قريبة منا بعيدة عنا، نتذكرك ولا نراك. فذكراك سيبقي في قلب كل من احبك، وما الموت الا رحلة من المنزل الفاني الي المنزل الباقي.
ألهم الله كل من أحبك ألصبر وألسلوان ، وتغمدك الله برحمته وأسكنك فسيح جناته.
والشكر لكل من ساهمنا في مصابنا الاليم، عسي ألا يرينا الله عليكم أي مكروه.

رحمها الله

Your Uncle Nizar

Hanan,

Heaven awaited your return

An angel borrowed to earth

Nurturing lives was your concern

Aligning life to what it is worth

Nursing through love on each and every turn

Your soul and name held that meaning
And had no fear from the bitterness of life
Replaced the negative with a positive feeling
You mastered it as a daughter, a sister, a friend and a wife
You finalized it with an angelic weaving
Departing your soul from the hefty body strife
Resting it eternally, in a place that is never leaving
The hearts of all who loved you,
WE LOVE YOU HANAN

Your Khalto Leila

Hanan was our spirit, our joy, our protection.
She was not like a toy, she was more.
She was a friend, family, and lots more.
I don’t remember a time I saw a frown on her face.

Your cousin Reeva

Paintings for Hanan

This painting is of Hanan… painted for a charity event that was supposed to be held by Hanan herself. The person in the painting is Hanan.

You see, with all the struggles that the world put her through, she remained as bright as the sun, and kept her inner peace, all the while spreading her love outwards, and giving her heart to everyone around her.

It dawned to me, that she inspired me to make my blog – Ingenious Health. My blog is powered by her superior being. She lives in us all.

Your cousin Dareen